My muse: Good morning! Time to get to work.
Me: It’s not morning. It’s dark outside.
Muse: To a writer that is what morning looks like.
Muse: You’re going to be alone in the dark typing way. You don’t need sunshine.
Me: That’s the kind of crazy logic that’s ruined some of my best stories.
Muse: I’ve been thinking, you haven’t posted a blog in quite awhile.
I say: No kidding. You’ve had me doing this novel thing, remember.
Muse: But I think we can do both, work on the novel and write blogs.
Me: This is new. Everytime I get distracted you flip out.
Muse: These young writers do it all the time, and do Facebook, and Twitter and even Snapchat.
Me: Notice the word “young” in your description.
Muse: Are you calling us old?
Me: I’m just saying, we don’t even know what Snapchat is!
Muse: Gotta be open to new things, that’s what creativity is all about, right?
Me: Who are you? Who stole my muse?
Muse: Just saying, don’t let the grass grow under you…
Me: Okay, please, enough with the clichés.
Muse: So let’s do it. The novel’s done, right?
Me: Well, the novel is pretty much written.
Muse: Worked out pretty well. Best stuff we’ve ever done, don’t you think?
Me: We’ll see.
Muse: What do you mean?
Me: I mean we’re the only ones who have read it. It always sounds good to us.
Muse: Good characters, though. I’ve liked hanging with them.
Me: You brought them to the party, so it’s nice that you like them.
Muse: I never really liked the last one.
Me: Who, Jason?
Muse: Yeah, thought Kate could have done better.
Me: Well, you brought him too. Said he had a story to tell. Besides he grows on you.
Muse: Once he began to change. Before that he was a creep.
Me: Then he sort of redeems himself. That’s what good stories are about.
Muse: Maybe, but I prefer the ones that are cool from the beginning.
Me: So let’s finish the novel and then we’ll…
Muse: You said it was done.
Me: Kind of, just a few rewrites, editing, etc. Now that we redid the ending.
Muse: Told you that needed a little something.
Me: Okay, that was good.
Muse: So what’s left to do?
Me: To start with, you can’t spell.
Muse: Neither can you!
Me: Sadly, true. So we need various kinds of editing and stuff.
Muse: Ugh! But that will mean rewrites and corrections. We’ve worked with her before.
Me: Yes, she’s been great.
Muse: I don’t think she likes me.
Me: Don’t be paranoid. She just likes proper grammar and is not fond of fragments.
Muse: And what about all those blue marks “TMW”
Me: That means: Too Many Words. She likes things more straightforward.
Muse: Not a big fan of Thomas Hardy, eh? Does she think we’re poets?
Me: I’m pretty sure there’s no confusion there.
Muse: Well…..I think fragments are cool.
Me: Get over yourself.
Muse: Okay, so now some blogs.
Me: So now some sleep.
Muse: That’s not how this works.
Me: Okay, so what do you have in mind?
Muse: Something outrageous.
Me: This doesn’t sound like you. Are you “on” something?
Muse: All the famous muses have been outrageous.
Me: All the famous muses have had something to say.
Muse: Let’s start with outrageous.
Me: Go be outrageous with someone else. I’m going back to sleep.
Muse: Okay, but I’ll be back.
Me: I know, I know.