Instructions from my muse


My muse:  Good morning! Time to get to work.

Me:            It’s not morning. It’s dark outside.

Muse:       To a writer that is what morning looks like.

Me:            What?

Muse:       You’re going to be alone in the dark typing way. You don’t need sunshine.

Me:            That’s the kind of crazy logic that’s ruined some of my best stories.

Muse:       I’ve been thinking, you haven’t posted a blog in quite awhile.

I say:         No kidding. You’ve had me doing this novel thing, remember.

Muse:       But I think we can do both, work on the novel and write blogs.

Me:            This is new. Everytime I get distracted you flip out.

Muse:       These young writers do it all the time, and do Facebook, and Twitter and even Snapchat.

Me:            Notice the word “young” in your description.

Muse:       Are you calling us old?

Me:            I’m just saying, we don’t even know what Snapchat is!

Muse:       Gotta be open to new things, that’s what creativity is all about, right?

Me:            Who are you? Who stole my muse?

Muse:       Just saying, don’t let the grass grow under you…

Me:            Okay, please, enough with the clichés.

Muse:       So let’s do it. The novel’s done, right?

Me:            Well, the novel is pretty much written.

Muse:       Worked out pretty well. Best stuff we’ve ever done, don’t you think?

Me:            We’ll see.

Muse:       What do you mean?

Me:            I mean we’re the only ones who have read it. It always sounds good to us.

Muse:       Good characters, though. I’ve liked hanging with them.

Me:            You brought them to the party, so it’s nice that you like them.

Muse:       I never really liked the last one.

Me:            Who, Jason?

Muse:       Yeah, thought Kate could have done better.

Me:            Well, you brought him too. Said he had a story to tell. Besides he grows on you.

Muse:       Once he began to change. Before that he was a creep.

Me:            Then he sort of redeems himself. That’s what good stories are about.

Muse:       Maybe, but I prefer the ones that are cool from the beginning.

Me:            So let’s finish the novel and then we’ll…

Muse:       You said it was done.

Me:            Kind of, just a few rewrites, editing, etc. Now that we redid the ending.

Muse:       Told you that needed a little something.

Me:            Okay, that was good.

Muse:       So what’s left to do?

Me:            To start with, you can’t spell.

Muse:       Neither can you!

Me:            Sadly, true. So we need various kinds of editing and stuff.

Muse:       Ugh! But that will mean rewrites and corrections. We’ve worked with her before.

Me:            Yes, she’s been great.

Muse:       I don’t think she likes me.

Me:            Don’t be paranoid. She just likes proper grammar and is not fond of fragments.

Muse:       And what about all those blue marks “TMW”

Me:            That means: Too Many Words. She likes things more straightforward.

Muse:       Not a big fan of Thomas Hardy, eh? Does she think we’re poets?

Me:            I’m pretty sure there’s no confusion there.

Muse:       Well…..I think fragments are cool.

Me:            Get over yourself.

Muse:       Okay, so now some blogs.

Me:            So now some sleep.

Muse:       That’s not how this works.

Me:            Okay, so what do you have in mind?

Muse:       Something outrageous.

Me:            This doesn’t sound like you. Are you “on” something?

Muse:       All the famous muses have been outrageous.

Me:            All the famous muses have had something to say.

Muse:       Let’s start with outrageous.

Me:            Go be outrageous with someone else. I’m going back to sleep.

Muse:       Okay, but I’ll be back.

Me:            I know, I know.





2 thoughts on “Instructions from my muse

  1. Wonderful! I had decided I must have been dropped from your distribution list for some reason…. Good to see you back — and good luck with your new novel!

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